Second off, Riding Bean is the best anime movie ever made. Simple fact, case closed. Whine and cry, you'll still be dumb and I will be right.

The characters are actually badass and interesting, as opposed to a sad and pathetic attempt to be funny, playing against the stereotype of pretty much anyone on this planet. It's really quite overdone as far as action scenes go, but still entertains more than some American movies (I dunno what ones tho).

But if you want your characters to be portrayed as badass types, one thing you do not do is show them early in the morning, completely nude while getting ready for their day. This was one place where the movie shows its roots in shitty typical anime bullshit bad-movie crapola.

One of the main characters is a female, and the whole movie is her and this badass guy (he's Bean apparently, and he's not a Brit) kicking ass of some type while solving some overcomplicated crime involving kidnapping and murder. But the first time we see her, she's totally nude, preparing for her busy day, WHILE NUDE, as she makes coffee and breakfast in general while shitty elevator music plays (oops, I meant to say "the soundtrack"). And then she's clothed all of a sudden.

But I guess this can be overlooked, because in reality we all begin the morning at some point, without all of our clothes on. Unless you're like me, perpetually hung over after being awake for 20 hours. But I guess that it's plausable, if totally inapropriate.

And then the makers of this movie commit a fatal mistake about 30 minutes later by putting in a scene where a 12 year old female sex-pot attempts to fondle some old guy's dick so he can piss in a tube while handcuffed to a chair. That right there is a movie killing scene.

And by the way, a kevlar bandanna is not a bandanna at all, and will NOT save your life if someone fires a bullet emitting weapon right at said bandanna. You will die, and the bandanna will be sticking out of the hole. YOU GET NOTHING, YOU LOSE, GOOD DAY SIR.

Review by:
Josh Cable

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